Becoming The Person You Want to Be Through Authenticity!
Authenticity is not just knowing, but demonstrating that being true to yourself in that moment is more important than whatever else is going on.
Authenticity declares that being true to yourself is more important than what others will think of you, it’s more important than someone’s opinion of you.
Authenticity is more important than someone not “liking” you anymore, because if we can be truly honest, that’s what we’re most afraid of really when we peel all the layers away. We’re afraid that if we act from a place of who we really are and what we really feel that we will be judged for it and potentially no longer be accepted within our tribe – be that our family, partner, friendships or our community.
This loss is my no means inevitable, people will react according to their willingness to grow with you, however the declaration that you are no longer willing to hold back your expansion for the sake of others comfort is where real growth occurs. Not just growth for you, but for those around you too, who are willing to come along for the ride. By you stepping into the world for who you really are, you are allowing those around you to do the same. You are raising their vibration along with yours.
Authenticity is powerful. Authenticity is a giant leap into self-love. Authenticity says, I’m willing to put self-love into practise, I’m taking it out into the real world with me. I am becoming self-love. What a compelling declaration of love to bestow yourself with.
Imagine someone else in your life speaking out in your honour. How loved would you feel? How much respect would you have for this person? How safe and cared for would you feel? In that very moment, how much trust would be bound into the heart of your relationship?
When you are willing to do this for yourself, the same love, respect and self-trust is born. Authenticity blasts out a very powerful message, to you, your higher self, the people around you and the universe at large. Authenticity says what I feel is important, how I feel matters, I care deeply about how my heart will be affected by suppressing it. I am no longer willing to allow judicious outcomes, that I am projecting, hold me back.
Authenticity is the foundation of internal peace. When you are truly allowing who you really are and what you heart desires, the internal struggle fades away. You release the resistance to who you really are, resistance is what creates the tug of war, without resistance, the rope falls, the battle ends.
So how do you get to a place of authenticity and become the person you want to be?
It’s a practice, and like any practice you will get more comfortable with it the more you practice. You can start out really simply.
Before you take any of these steps, It is important that your intention for doing this is clear. Remind yourself that the person/people around you may not like or agree with you and that is totally fine. You expressing yourself authentically is now more important to you than presenting a false truth to appease others.
This is not about hurting the people around you, this is not your intention, how they react is their responsibility and a reflection of them, this is about knowing who you truly are and honouring yourself for this.
So here are some simple ways to start practicing authenticity….You will naturally progress with this in areas of your life that are relevant to your growth once you begin to get more comfortable with it.
P.S. You will only get more comfortable with it by practicing.
- Order something you really want on the menu, even if it means your partner/friend won’t get to taste/share some of what they really wanted you to order….Prioritise yourself….and be ok with that
- Say no to an invitation that you genuinely don’t want to go to, but feel that you should go to, even though you know its going to stress you out / bore you to tears / take up time you would rather spend elsewhere
- Say yes to an invitation that you genuinely do want to go to, even though you may feel that you don’t have time / might not know many people there / can’t really afford it
- Offer your honest view on something in a conversation where other people feel differently
- Do something that other people may think is out of character for you even though it’s something you would genuinely love to do, but perhaps your fear of their opinion has been holding you back
- Say no to an opportunity that you are presented with because you feel it will drain you / it’s not aligned with your beliefs / it will compromise your time. You can thank them for the opportunity and simply say it’s not right for you at the moment, that you cannot commit to it fully
- Say no to a favour/expectation that someone asks of you that you don’t want to fulfil but feel you have to. Again, you can thank them for asking you and still say no
The purpose of these tasks are to get you comfortable with taking steps towards authenticity. They will not feel comfortable at first, but that’s the point. The more you practice these things the more comfortable and authentic you will feel and they more effortlessly you will practice authenticity in your life.
Authenticity is self-love. Every action you take that is not aligned to who you truly are is a form of self-rejection. And self-rejection hurts us, deeply. It re-confirms our most negative belief about ourselves that we are not good enough. Every act of authenticity is a step towards self love, a step towards healing all those times where felt we had to hide ourselves in order to receive the acceptance of others. Authenticity is our declaration that we really are enough, that we ourselves believe this and that is enough. Those around us who truly love us, already know this, their acceptance is already there, it will not disappear as we fear, it will only magnify as they see the true you appear in all of your glory.
Those who cannot accept our authentic selves will fall away from our lives as we continue to grow, they may eventually catch up with us and join our path again or their absence will make room in our life for those who can love us love us fully. But ultimately it’s our choice to create this space or allow it to be filled with substandard relationships.
What actions will you take to help you feel more authentic? How has being more authentic improved your life? Share in the comments below